A note for my little girl on her 3rd birthday!!!

Dear My Sweet Emma,

Today marks three years since you blessed us with your birth. You where born at 8:43pm and weighed 5lbs 2oz and where 17 1/4 inches long. Although you came 7 1/2 weeks early and we where scared to death that it "was just too soon", you where absolutely beautiful. I will never forget the first time I saw you and got to hold you tiny little hand, you where just absolutely perfect... I guess I need to back up and tell you why you graced our presents so early...

I was in the hospital for a routine 24hour check (because I got really sick with your Bubba) and when my day shift nurse was leaving for the day she checked all my vitals and your heart rate. At first she thought she was getting both our hearts on your little monitor, but that was not the case. Your heart rate was up over 300 (that is as high as the machine would go) and before I knew it I had 2 doctors, 5 nurses a ultra sound tech and a surgical nurse all prepping me for your delivery via c-section. I still remember it like it was yesterday, the nurse's running down the hall pushing me into the OR and your Daddy telling your Maw Maw that "everything is going to be fine". Twenty minutes later I gave birth to a beautiful blonde haired (well, what you had) blue eyed tiny little girl and she was perfect...

Four days after you where born is when ALL the fun started... Because of your heart rate the doctors decided to send you for a couple test on your heart. We found out July 1st that you where born with multiple heart defects. You where diagnosed with Corrected Transposition of the great arteries, VSD (hole in your heart), Pulmonary Stenosis, Sub- Pulmonary Stenosis, SVT, WPW and an Abnormal Tricuspid valve with some regurgitation (later on we found out that you where in the very beginning stages of heart failure). I was scared to death and felt like all the oxygen in the room was sucked out when the doctor told us. I remember I just sat there in the rocking chair next to your bed and just stared at you while I was holding your tiny little hand. I heard every word that the doctor said, I just didn't want to believe it... I later went into the dressing room after our visit with you (I had to take off the hospital gown) and totally lost it, I fell back against the wall (thank God it was there to catch me) and just bawled. At the time I was soooo scared that we where going to lose you and I didn't have the courage to ask if you where going to make it or not.

Considering all your problems you where doing REALLY well. Of course you had the normal breathing and feeding issues for a baby as early as you where, but you looked really good. When you where about a week old you started vomiting and couldn't hold anything down, they decided to do an abdominal x-ray and some more blood work and found out that you had what they called NEC (Necrotizing Enterocolitis), you where becoming really sick, really fast. Later the decision was made to transfer you to Texas Children's Hospital due to your heart condition and now this NEC thing.

When we got to TCH the Dr's there ran a bunch more of their own test and came to the same conclusion as the Dr's at Memorial City Hospital where you where born... Over time you started to get a little bigger and where doing OK (you still vomited often), but we where told that was due to acid reflux. Two and a half months after you where born we FINALLY got to take you HOME. You did come home on a feeding tube and ALOT of medications (About 6), but you where doing better. After about a week at home you started vomiting again (and alot), so off we go back to TCH emergency room with you. The ER ran some really yucky test and come to find out you had multiple bowel obstructions and where going to require surgery to remove them. On August 31st we had to hand over our beautiful little girl to a team of dr's and nurses to preform a difficult surgery on you. They ended up having to take out a part of you bowel and your appendix due to all the scaring and obstructions from the NEC. After just a day you got the feeding tube taken out and never had one again. You where doing perfect and it seemed as though this surgery made everything right in your little body, You where finally able to eat and gain weight. Two weeks after surgery we got to take you home for the second time and what a blessing it was. When we got you home, you where just like any other baby your age, you loved to play, eat, all the things a baby loves to do. You never acted like you had any kind of heart condition or had just had surgery a few weeks before. Everything was finally perfect, everyone was healthy, happy and HOME!!!

You have been doing soooooo GREAT, you amaze everyone that knows you and knows what you have been through. There have been other hospital visits due to your heart rate and very scary moments when the crash cart was grabbed for you, but you are such a strong little girl and are such a blessing and amazement. I know that down the road you are going to need multiple open heart surgeries, but for now we will not worry about that, for now we are going to enjoy every moment and every day with you and worry about the other stuff later.

My sweet little girl never forget where you have come from and how far you have come. I always want you to take your story with you. I think it makes you the strong little girl you are. I also think that God gave YOU this special heart to teach you and others to cherish the small things in life and that no matter what life throws at you, you can always take your own path to get around it... I love you sweet girl, more than you will ever know. I know you will not read this probably for a very long time, but I want you to have your first couple chapters of life. I know there are more chapters still to write, but I also know that they will be just as amazing as the first three...

Happy Birthday Sweet Girl!!!

Love Always And Forever,

Your Mommy
xoxoxoxo

Birthday's, Birthday's Every Where!!!

Wow, one of these day's I am going to get better at this whole blog thing, but for now let me tell you about what has been going on...

We just celebrated Katelyn's 8th birthday this past weekend and she did not want a party this year, she wanted to have dinner and the Houston Downtown Aquarium. We had an awesome time and I think all the kids had fun eating with all the fish around them. Then Sunday we went over to Non and Grans for fathers day and had a little family party there with the rest of our family. It was such and awesome weekend, I just wished it could of lasted a little longer... Sorry the picture is blurry, it was dark inside and I took it with my phone, my camera decided to poop out on me at dinner!!!

This coming up weekend is Emma and Non's (Josh's Mom) birthday on Sunday. We are planning on going to Chuck E. Cheese to celebrate, but Emma still wanted to have a tinker bell party so I will just decorate everything there with Tinker Bell. I can not believe that my baby girl is going to be three... It seems like just yesterday I had her and was traveling back and forth to the hospital (or not leaving at all) to see her. She was there for 3 1/2 months and sometimes I feel so cheated of that important time with her, but I thank God every day that we live in a place with such a great hospital and doctors. With out all of the medical staff, our prayer warriors and Most of all God, I don't think our precious Emma would be here with us today... She is such a miracle and amazes me every day. She has come such a long way from the days in the hospital when we where praying to God not to take her, we need more time with this little girl. Now I am praying to God to give me the strength and energy to keep up with her and I am soooo thankful for that. She does still have a long way to go and many surgeries in her future, but she is a fighter and such a strong little thing, I know she can make it through anything with the grace and help of God...

Emma did just have her first BIG ballet recital and she did awesome. They danced to three different songs "L.O.V.E", "In my daughters eyes" and "I can't help falling in love". I was afraid that she was going to get stage fright like she did and Christmas and just stand there, but she didn't, she danced to every song and looked like she had been doing it for ever,(she even sang all the words to the songs as she was dancing). The recital was held in a huge High School auditorium and was a totally amazing production for a bunch of 2-5 year olds, I can't wait till next year...

My little man Nickolas is getting bigger and smarter every day. He is doing so much better on his talking, you can understand almost EVERYTHING that he says now (unless he is playing and wants to talk funny). He is such a ball of energy and is constantly on the GO, I don't think he ever stops unless he is eating, sleeping or something on TV catches his eye (and sometimes not even then,lol). He is such a sweet little boy and makes my day every morning when he gets up and tells me "Good morning Mommy, I love you, did you have sweet dreams?". He tells me all the time now that I am the best Mommy in the whole world and that I am his best friend. I hope it stays that way even when he is all grown up, he makes my heart smile when he says stuff like that, I could just eat him up... He is getting to be such a handsome little man, I think I am going to have to beat all the little girls off with a stick when he gets older... I am such a lucky women, God has blessed me with such beautiful and sweet children (well sweet most of the time, they still have their moments, as do us all).

As for me and Josh, it is pretty much the same ol' same ol'... I am still staying at home with the kids and doing all the daily house and kid stuff and Josh is still working nights at the same company he's been with for the last few years. Unfortunately his hours have got cut back to 32 hours do to the oil spill in the Gulf and our president stopping all new oil drilling (oh, for some of y'all that don't know, Josh is working in the welding business, they weld big parts for oil companies and alot of though's parts go out to rigs in the gulf). So we are just praying for the work to pick up and that he will start getting more hours soon... I have thought about going back to work, (prob in home health care again), but I would be working just to put two kids in daycare and that is just not a smart idea right now... So for now we just tighten down our belts for awhile, do what we gotta do and pray that the work picks up soon...

So that is what my little family has been up to, nothing glamorous, but we like it and are very happy to be in the place that we are in right now... I do have one request for everyone that is reading this... Please continue to pray for Emma, I know it sounds crazy, but I hope they decide to do her surgery sooner than later... I think that the older she gets the harder it will be on her and the more she will remember... We know with out a doubt she will have to have this done, so I would rather he have it done while she won't remember to much. I am also going to ask that you pray for Josh's work and that business picks up soon, we are doing ok finacally right now, but if it keeps going like this or if he loses anymore hours I am not sure how it will affect us. Thank you so much for keeping up with my family, I know I am not the best blogger, but I try and I promise I am going to write another post on Sunday for my Emma, I will just be something for her 3rd birthday and just reflecting where we are and how far we have come...

Lots of heart hugs and God Bless...

Samantha xoxoxo